Embrace 101
Self-love is tough. It’s an exercise that needs daily practice. Because many of us (myself included) are not quite there yet, the EMBRACE series will help both me and you to get the journey started. Welcome to the first chapter, it’s called “We’ve Got This”.
Let’s be honest. I’m struggling. Every. Single. Day. There, I said it. Acknowledging that I don’t always love the way I look may or may not be a revelation to some people. To others, the fact that I base selflove on my physical appearance might raise red flags. Understanding the origin of my struggle feels liberating and scary at the same time. Let me break it down: expressing a negative emotion means creating awareness for it – and that is scary AF. It feels like opening up Pandora’s box of questions starting from “what defines beauty?” to “why do I need to be beautiful?”. Do you see where this is going? Me neither, which is exactly my point. Confusion is a big part of the problem. In order to detangle the mess that the American journalist Naomi Wolf called “The Beauty Myth”, I’m on my way to find answers and ultimately, get closer to self-llove and acceptance in the process. But first things first.
Status Quo
Growing up as a young woman surrounded by social media and all its perfectionism and beauty madness is toxic. I would lie if I told you I have never felt intimidated by the “perfect” bodies I saw in fashion magazines, on TV or these days on Instagram. But who can blame me, yells my inner feminist. As a woman, I grew up not only reduced to thinking the way I look is all I should care about. On top of that I should obey to a beauty standard that even supermodels find impossible to fulfil. No wonder I feel overwhelmed. And as far as I know, I’m certainly not alone with this. There’s been numerous studies demonstrating that media consumption has negative effects on women’s body image and self-confidence. Considering that I spent several hours of the day browsing through Instagram, might reveal a masochistic tendency. As a consequence, I feel that my relationship with my body is the result of a culmination of different factors constantly holding me back from liking and accepting my body in its natural state. It all starts with the beauty industry sectioning female bodies into “problematic areas”. For every part of a female body, there’s not only a product but an entire “market”. After using a gazillion beauty products throughout my young life and spending fortunes on them along the way, I want to take a step back to grasp all of this. Let’s talk beauty industry. The concept is simple: selling works through the discrimination of natural bodies. Even without dragging the media into this, there is a constant social pressure for women to “look beautiful”, no matter in which culture you live in. As if a woman’s appearance alone justifies her role in society. But we’ll get to that.
Truth is, accepting and loving your body is anything but easy when society is telling you to hate it. A regular check-up among my girlfriends reveals that every female person I know feels insecure about their bodies. Even the most “conventionally beautiful” woman knows what I’m talking about. But why is that? Who is responsible for this and how can we change the way we see ourselves? With the first step creating awareness for the subject, the next will be education.
In order for you to be able to join the conversation, I invite you to get some reading done. For my German speaking friends, I highly recommend the book “Fuck Beauty” written by Nunu Kaller. Based on her personal story, the Austrian journalist analyzes why so many women feel unsatisfied with their bodies. My next read would be the aforementioned “Beauty Myth” by Naomi Wolf. Since it’s a classic of feminist literature, I thought I would give it a try and let you know how it goes. In the meantime, keep your head up and remember: we’ve got this and we are all in this together.